joke

[Burd]

😂

[Lee Stewart]

[Too Many Projects]

Bob feared his wife Peg wasn't hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid.

Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem.

The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.

'Here's what you do,' said the Doctor, 'stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you.

If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.'

That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he was In the den.


He says to himself, 'I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens. ’


Then in a normal tone he asks, 'Honey, what's for dinner?'

No response.

So the husband moves closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife and repeats,


'Peg, what's for dinner?'

Still no response.

Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his Wife and asks,
'Honey, what's for dinner?'

Again he gets no response.

So, he walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away.
'Honey, what's for dinner?'

Again there is no response.

So he walks right up behind her. 'Peg, what's for dinner?'

(I just love this)

'For God’s sake, Bob, for the FIFTH time, CHICKEN!'

[olredalert]

----Boy, does that hit close to home.....Bill S

[Keith Seymore]

I just got new hearing aids a few months ago, at my family's urging (and after seeing the test data for myself).

So far, from what I can tell, the only things I couldn't hear are:

a). A lot of high frequency hashy fan noise
b). The dishwasher beeping at the end of its cycle.
c). My wife's speaking voice

K

[Too Many Projects]

Originally Posted by olredalert

----Boy, does that hit close to home.....Bill S

What's that you said ???

High frequency hearing loss since infancy from pneumonia. Didn't have a clue until I was inducted into the Army in 1971. Failed for hearing loss, medical exemption.

Keith, I have hearing aids too, but wear them very limited times because of hearing too much background noise. I still don't hear high frequencies, because the ability isn't there, not just diminished...
The tinnitus seems to get worse with age and the ringing can drive me nuts at times now.

[olredalert]

----I have had hearing aids for the last 5 or 6 years. Couldn't do without them when you have a wife with no patience. Probably racing related, but who knows with all the cherry bombs and other stupid stuff kids do. What mine really help is with the treble, as I can at least hear most of the base stuff without them......Bill S

[Lynn]

You guys are really bringing me down. This is supposed to be the joke thread.

I came here for a laugh. Now I am worried that I may be next. So far, I am blessed. My mom has had chronic hearing issues for 50 years, as did her mother. Two of my three brothers have severe hearing loss. Guessing it is probably inevitable.

Any Arkansas guys on here? My in laws live in Arkansas. Finest folks you ever met in your life. They roll with the punches when I tell Arkansas jokes. So, back to our regularly scheduled program.

What lives in Arkansas and has 28 teeth?


A family of four.


What is the first question on the Arkansas bar exam?



When two people get divorced, are they still cousins?


I enjoyed it when Ram Air Dave was on the site. He lives in North Little Rock. Every time I told an Arkansas joke, he would tell an Okie joke.

[Keith Seymore]

Originally Posted by Lynn

You guys are really bringing me down. This is supposed to be the joke thread.

I came here for a laugh. Now I am worried that I may be next. So far, I am blessed. My mom has had chronic hearing issues for 50 years, as did her mother. Two of my three brothers have severe hearing loss. Guessing it is probably inevitable.

I'm sorry, Lynn. I didn't mean to bring you down.

It's just I did think it was funny that, in all the situations I find myself in, and of all the sounds on the earth, and all the humans on the earth, the only sound of any consequence I can't hear is my wife.

Given this newfound piece of data, one might conclude that one could SIMPLY ASK THAT ONE PERSON TO SPEAK LOUDER, or, in addition, NOT TRY TO CONVEY CRITICAL FAMILY OR SOCIAL INFORMATION WHILE STANDING IN THE UPSTAIRS BEDROOM CLOSET while I am on the main floor in the kitchen CLEANING UP MY OWN DAMN MESS, as I was gently reminded.

Alas, as any older married man might guess, it is not a viable strategy.

K

[Too Many Projects]

WOW, isn't that the truth. My wife has known for 29 years that I have difficulty hearing her meek, quiet voice and she STILL will ask me something from the other end of the house ... And then complain that all I ever say to her is WHAT ??!!

Such is life and I am thankful she's a very patient person who puts up with my idiosyncrasies. Life goes on.